I received this book for free. This does not impact my review in any shape or form.

Raising Capable Kids: The 12 Habits Every Parent Needs Regardless of their Child’s Label of Challenge, by Deborah Winking, is a self-help parenting book for caregivers learning how to support kids with special needs. The book is separated into different habits that each caregiver can follow and provides steps that they can take to build those habits. At the end of each habit lies reflections and exercises that caregivers can practice to build healthy coping skills for themselves and their children. Winking offers realistic solutions to caregivers who struggle with understanding their child and provides a comforting ear to combat burnout. 

I appreciate how Winking incorporates person-centered approaches and emphasizes the need to build a working relationship with the child (keyword being working). It’s not a secret that, whether you’re a therapist, a teacher, a caregiver, or someone who enjoys helping kids with different perspectives in life, to get someone to learn, you have to have some rapport with them. This book wholeheartedly rejects the “do what I say, not as I do” attitude and instead tries to get caregivers to comprehend their child’s perspectives of the world. I enjoyed the vignettes throughout the book; the book becomes more digestible and encourages the reader to learn more about how they were able to be successful. Profesionally-wise, I would use this book as a supplement to other parenting curricula, such as Nurturing Parenting. 

I can also see this book being put to use for adult children struggling with severe mental illness and who are living with their parents. Is the situation ideal? No, especially when one year, your adult child was living independently and doing well for themselves, and then the next, they’re suddenly struggling with activities of daily living. It’s not uncommon to see some regression for those with mental illness, especially those diagnosed with a form of schizophrenia or PTSD. Sometimes, it can feel like you really are teaching a child all over again. Despite that, I can pinpoint certain situations in my practice where I felt a habit listed in the book would help a parent understand more of what their children are going through. 

A side note: the book reminded me of when I was younger and struggled with reading. We’re not just born knowing how. We need to be able to sound out words, understand those words, understand the words that make up different phrases, and understand how to properly string them together into a coherent paragraph. But though I hated reading, the tone Winking uses reminded me of all those patient, patient teachers who willingly worked with me. It’s a nostalgic memory that adds to the book’s value.